sandbaggers: Neil and Laura

Neil and Laura

Sun, 24 Mar 1996 10:31:22 -0400 (EDT)

Alas, I disagree with both evaluations of the Laura/Neila relationship.
I am not at all a sentimental romantic, but I think Neil really cared for
her as a woman. He obviously didn't want her as a SAndbagger, but she
did prove herself. I think his interest in her was purely personal,
and if you remember his anguish just before he sent her off to Berlin,
you'll also remember how he kept saying, "She's Berlin-orientated, she's
Berlin-orientated." I took that to mean he'd delayed sending her on that
mission because of his love for her and his fear for her life if
something went wrong. He was castigating himself as a professional for
not sending her immediately. Her death was necessary to him as a
professional, but his anguish was personal. Not only had he lost another
Sandbagger, but he'd also lost a woman he cared very much for.

As for her feelings for him, it was explained in the first "Laura"
episode that she had sexual and emotional hangups that her marriage had
exacerbated. She was willing to accept NEil's love as long as it didn't
get too intense or demanding. The suggestion was, as I saw it, that
given enough time, she would have been able to care just as deeply for
him. And the fact that he was willing to accept this "half a loaf" is
probably more proof of his love.

I think perhaps we hate to think of Neil as being able to love anyone in
the normal sense, so it's extremely tempting to assign all sorts of
unpleasant attributes to him as far as his interpersonal relationships
go. But even people living on the edge, which Neil certainly did! are
capable of at least a minimum amount of healthy needs and desires.
Laura's being in his field would have posed a very intersting (from a
psychological point of view) dilemma if their relationship had been
allowed to progress to an intimate affair or marriage. How would Neil
have been able to handle Laura's working at such a hazardous job? And
whether or not she kept her SB job, would he have been a better husband
(or lover) to her than he'd been to whatsername? Would he have come home
at night at a reasonable hour? Relaxed a bit? Wanted to raise a family?

Intruiging, isn't it?

Hilde Horvath